Baby Steps

All new things start with baby steps. My first step was to have my surgery. 8 hrs in the operating room and then 6 days in the hospital. On the first day I was up walking a full lap around the nurses station, then I spent most of the day up in the chair. The nurses were saying how well I was doing, beyond what they had seen. I was determined to spend every possible moment awake up in the chair which is the only way I could get better. By my last day there I had walked 3 laps around the nurses station in the morning and again another time in the evening. Within a week and a half of being out of the hospital I was able to walk around the house without the walker.

All these small baby steps forward and then I got a viral brain infection that completely knocked me for a loop for nearly 2 weeks. The fevers are finally gone I hope, but the nausea has hung on. Yesterday I could finally get some toast down and some fluids. Today I was able to eat some cereal and toast.

Nearly a month later that 2 week set back took its toll. But today was a nice sunny day and a little warmer. With a few days above freezing the roads and sidewalks are pretty clear so I was able to take a short walk with out risk of falling. I made it about 6 blocks round trip. Not much but considering how little I have been able to do that is HUGE for me. I would rather not tell you however that that short little jaunt took me nearly 35 min and my heart rate got going even at that ridiculously slow pace that isn't even fast enough for a good Oregon girl. I feel like I just did a 5 mile run.

To think I was running marathons, and now I am barely walking 6 blocks without being fully exhausted for the rest of the day. But I am so grateful after the past 2 week set back that I could do as much as I did. All this is only by God's grace and mercy. He is my strength and my salvation. In Him I can do all things. The top of the mountain looks so far away but He doesn't call me to run there. He only asks that I take steps forward. In my case it is baby steps for now. And I am learning to accept that.

Sorry It's been a while!!!

Sorry that it has been a while since my last post. I broke my 6 days of fever finally and went for a CT scan as well as blood work. I just have not been feeling well, and sleeping a lot. I have been very nauseous and super sensitive to smells of any kind. My stomach is one of the things not recovered yet, and the vomiting and fevers for those 6 days have whipped me out. Hopefully the doctor will have my CD of the CT scan so he can look at what the reporting doctor had said regarding the fluid on the brain and inflammation. The ideal situation would have been to go pick it up myself and mail it next day air but unfortunately that wasn't an option so instead I am at the will of the hospital.

My mom is still here and happy to be flying home tomorrow. It has been a long few weeks but I really could not have made it without her. God is good!

Thanks for everyone who are sending messages and notes of encouragement. It is a true blessing.

Update

So yesterday, the doctor decided after 6 days of moderate temperatures to finally send me for a CT scan of my brain as well as blood work. Today they called me and told me the blood work was OK. So it is likely a viral infection that I was dealing with. The CT scan however shows inflammation in the brain and fluid around the brain. This could be a problem or it could be normal considering I have just had brain surgery. The surgeon is waiting to receive a copy of the CD so that he can evaluate it himself and determine if these things are just normal post surgical things or whether this is a complication that needs to be taken care of. t

Today, I had a day free of fevers for the first time since last Thursday. I am still dealing with the headaches and just not feeling good. But considering all I have been through in the past week, it is probably going to be a while before I am feeling much better. But that time will come soon enough.

Please pray for a timely arrival of the CD to the Surgeon and for things to be clear as to what is going on. Pray for wisdom on there end as to what needs to be done if anything.

Physical therapy

Today, I went to my first physical therapy appointment. Today was just an evaluation so they could make a plan for my recovery. They are focusing on my necks strength and mobility. Also they are going to ask the doctor for permission to extend my physical therapy to work on strength in the rest of my body especially legs, and arms. as well they will work on my balance.

Starting next week I will begin physical therapy 3 to 4 days a week for the next 3 months. I am looking forward to starting this next phase in my recovery. For the next few weeks I am still not allowed to drive so that is the largest challenge I have. But I have recently found out that my hospital has a car that will transport a person back and forth for appointments and for employees they wave the fee. They serve a 30min radius. My house is hopefully just barely in that radius. They said they would see and as long as it is close they would provide transportation as they can. It's a very small group and is first come first serve but hopefully that will work for a for a few weeks till I can drive.

Serious situation

So Thursday was my first follow up with my neurologist since my surgery. This is the original doctor who diagnosed me and she has been my staunchest supporter through all of this. One of the first things she said was, "Wow you look very pale and have very bad circles under your eyes." At that point I didn't realize how sick I was and I was just excited to show her I had done so well since my surgery. After leaving her office I proceeded to vomit during the ride home. Once I was home the vomiting continued. By about 5 am that had settled but the headache and neck pain was still very severe. Friday morning out of the blues I decided to check my temperature and to my dismay it was 99.9. This is only a moderate temperature but in light of just recently having brain surgery is a very important thing to pay attention to.

So I called my surgeons office and the nurse was concerned as well. She called the doctor as soon as he was finished with surgery and following that she called me back and explained that they want to monitor it over the weekend to see what happens. Really the main thing they can look at is my temperature and they are hoping it does not hit 100.3. Normally they look at temperature, a headache, stiff neck and sometimes a rash.

Well headaches are difficult in this case because post surgery that can be normal or a sign of other things. Stiff neck is also difficult because I just had major surgery which is going to require a couple months of physical therapy for my neck. However, I have been working on this and have had decent mobility and now with this it has gone to virtually no movement.

The main thing is if I have a fever of 100.3 or if vomiting continues then I am to call them and speak with the on-call doctor or go to an ER. Some are asking why wait? Well, currently the experts in this are concerned but also think that there is not much they can do to diagnose it at this time. One of the main diagnoses tools is a spinal tap and we all know how well that went last time. Beyond that I am not sure whether it is even possible to do a spinal tap this soon after brain surgery.

Friday night my temperature broke and there was a little improvement in my symptoms. However early Saturday morning those symptoms worsened as did my temperature. I am concerned that things are obscure and I am definitely not feeling well. My plan is to call the doctor Monday as long as things stay as they are and be firm with them that I would like a further evaluation. Being that the difference between whether it is a viral or bacterial infection becomes a critical situation and the symptoms are not really clear I don't want to wait too long.

Please pray that the symptoms become very clear and the doctors can differentiate them to make a clear diagnosis. Either one is serious but one is much more serious than the other. Pray for wisdom as to what tests to do and when.

Thanks to everyone who has been so concerned about this as well so supportive! It has been an overwhelming blessing.

No more staples!

Today was my first follow-up with my doctor since I had surgery. My friend picked me up and drove me there. I have been experiencing a very bad low-pressure headache which is not unexpected following this major surgery. It is related to my body's slow adaption to the changes of pressure in my brain. This one however, has been very intense, including vomiting. My poor friend had to put up with it on the way home. Thank God she had a plastic bag :-)

The doctor was impressed with my recovery but was concerned that I did not look well today. I was very pale and had circles under my eyes. They took my staples out which was a big relief. She did say though that there was great improvement in my muscle weakness which is a huge step.

Now I am home and I am not moving. For some reason movement is what my body can't handle. It didn't matter if it was me moving or the car moving. So for now, it is a mellow evening with hopes that this will pass soon!

Last night I had a hard time falling asleep. The pain medicine keeps me wired and so most nights I don't sleep or don't sleep well. I have been trying different things to try and make things more conducive to sleep. Last night I think I managed to fall asleep around 3am. I did not stay asleep well this time however, because I was having serious neck pain and base of the skull pain. It is really hard to describe but I feel like I need to pop my neck like a chiropractor. Now don't go sending me emails about how I shouldn't :-), I know that I should not and will not, believe me! However, that is the best way I can describe it. It is probably the most pain apart from headaches that I have had since the surgery. I finally gave up around 8 am and just got up.

Since then I have now added one of my bad headaches that are super painful. I can't find a position to get comfortable in but the least comfortable is laying down. I am praying I will find some relief from this soon and that in the meantime I handle it with grace and strength. God is my ever present help in times of need and this situation is no different.

One thing I am extremely grateful for is the help of my mother, who flew here for three weeks to help me. For those of you who know our relationship, you know this could be a recipe for disaster. This has been one of my biggest prayer requests and God has answered it in a huge way. We are 2 weeks into her stay today and it has been a huge blessing. I have really enjoyed the time we have had and the support she has been. She has helped me take baths and showers, she has cleaned, she has washed my hair, and braided my hair. She has done laundry and she picks up things off the floor because I can't. She is painting somethings that needed to have touched up. She is like superwoman. I really can't imagine how I would have gotten through these 2 weeks without her. I can't lift, I can't bend over, I couldn't walk for a while without help, I really couldn't cook or do much of anything. I don't know how I would have accomplished these tasks without her. And God has so perfectly guided each day that it has been pleasant and encouraging, no mother daughter fights that could easily be a problem between us. Praise God for this miracle and blessing!

How a day in our house looks:

Once we have showered and ate my mom and I have been spending a lot of time knitting. This is often how it looks around our house right now. Sometimes it includes watching a movie but most of the time it is knitting.




Faith laying around and always looking for a good belly rub!


If Faith is not getting a belly rub she loves to lay on the end of the lazy boy chair when I am in it.

surgery update

Overall my recovery has been much better than I expected! I have been really blessed by how God is providing and giving me exactly the strength I need it, when I need it. However, today is a more difficult day. I am nauseous and having a bad headache. Overall I just feel very blah and uncomfortable. Days like today make me very grateful for the good days and I look forward to when this day is over and I can begin a new day.

This evening we are preparing for a snow and ice storm which should make for some interesting times the next 48 hours. I love snow but ice I can do without. Last night the town did a big snow clearing event to try and get rid of the lingering snow in the streets in preparation for this next storm.