Nursing school update

So I went into the school on Tuesday to take a Pharmacology for Math challenge test. They require this class for admittance into the nursing program. I spent my vacation studying math. When I arrived I felt pretty good except for the IV infusion problems. When I sat down for the test I just prayed "Lord please don't let there be many on the test and if there is please help me to remember." Well, after the test I sat and waited for it to be graded. I was sooooooo nervous, I couldn't stop shaking. Tests freak me out anyway but I knew that if I was going to have a chance to be in the program that I needed to pass this test. A half hour later the dean walks in and says you passed but you need to work on the infusion problems. Thank you Lord was all I could say. I will have to know those but at least I have some time in order to get better acquainted with them.

At this point I have passed the test but still don't know if there is a seat in the program. Mind you the program starts less than 24 hours later. As I was sitting there they were discussing another students who they were waiting on to let them know if she was going to be in the program or not. Then they realized that she hadn't taken the math challenge and they weren't going to wait on her anymore. Sweet I thought and then they said ok you are in. I could not contain my excitement.

I promptly texted my brother to let him know and he proceeded to tell me to triple check before I told the world. I figure that since I have now sat in on orientation, bought my books, bought my uniform, began studying, and saw my horrendous bill that this constitutes a safe time to inform you all that I am officially in. Yippee!

Wednesday was the first of a 2 day orientation where they proceeded to scare the living daylights out of each one of us. I am now wondering what they were thinking when they accepted me and what I was thinking when I applied. I will spend 28 hours in class or clinical time and then will have a boat load of studying. Throughout the semesters I will have must pass tests on top of my other tests that if I do not pass I will be dropped from the program. My grade will be based on test scores and my license will be dependent on a major test. Have I told you lately that tests freak me out. I am a B average student in college because they had papers and other assignments to help our grade. I have major test anxiety and even if I know all of the material inside and out I have managed to fail tests. I had a teacher help me with this problem and it has been better but it doesn't take away the anxiety I feel.

I also know that I need to work in order to make it financially through this year and that is going to be tough. I have yet to find someone in my program who is doing so. Ahhhh! I really hope that I can do a lot of one-to-one babysitting jobs at the hospital which will allow for lots of studying but that is still a ways out of possibilities.

Though as I have panicked this past week, God has brought me comfort. First and foremost in the fact that He has directed every step of the way and that has been evident. Just in the process as things have been back and forth I have had a peace that God was in control and that I could trust that. In the end He showed Himself as He moved mountains to get me into the program less than 24 hours from the start.

Also on Wednesday I went to Church and the pastor taught on Isaiah 40. I won't put it here but I highly encourage you to read through it all. It was amazing as he started in saying "Comfort oh comfort my people." Then He goes on to talk about the Glory of the Lord and preparing a way for Him referring to the coming of Jesus. "The grass dies and flowers fall, but the Word of the Lord will live forever." The word of God and Jesus will live forever as we pass, and this earth fades. Then Isaiah talks about the supremacy of God "Who has measured the oceans in the palm of His hand? Who used His hand to measure the sky?.....Can you compare God to anything?...God sits on his throne above the circle of the earth..." This leaves you thinking of How great God is and how could he care about the little things in our lives like nursing school or a test. Yet He doesn't leave it there. He goes on to say that "The Lord is the God who lives forever, who created all the world. He does not become tired or need to rest...He gives strength to those who are tired and more power to those who are weak...The people who trust the Lord will become strong again. They will rise up as an eagle in the sky; they will run and not need rest; they will walk and not become tired."

Though God is great and mighty He does care about his people and He will lift them up. As nervous as I am about this year I can take comfort in the fact that He guides our very steps. He opened the door for nursing school and he will guide me through.

Thanks for all of your prayers this summer and I look forward to them as I continue into the next phase. Next September I will cross that stage with my diploma in hand.